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"..THOSE WE LOVE MOST and it grabbed me from the first page.."
—Gayle King,
O, The Oprah Magazine,
September 2012 

 

Lee Woodruff's 'real life" touches 'Those We Love Most'-USA Today, 9/5/12
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Entries in veterans (2)

Wednesday
May222013

The War Bike 

There’s a butterfly scar on my left knee that I refer to as my war injury.  It’s the legacy of a spectacular crash into a metal telephone pole support, while riding what my sisters and I fondly called “The War Bike.” 

 
The War Bike had been my mother’s childhood transportation in the years following World War II.  The wobbly, ox-blood frame had big, fat tires (not the chic beach bike tires of today) and an ungainly basket on the handlebars.  Think of bobby-socked British school children riding along a country road in the 40’s. My legs were just a touch too short to sit down comfortably, so I spent a lot of time standing up and pumping the pedals.  Riding it felt a little like piloting an ocean liner. 

 
It’s amazing that the bike survived all those years in my grandparent’s garage to make it to our little center hall colonial in Delmar, New York.  Objects today have a half-life of a nanosecond.  We throw something out with a dent or a scrape.  People were much thriftier back then; they repurposed things, recycled and re-used.  


Photo by Shane Henderson.
Riding the War Bike somehow connected me to a glorious past as I studied American history in school; one with freedom fighting revolutionary battles, brave Clara Bartons, the storming of Normandy beaches and concentration camp liberations.  War heroes were our country’s legacy.  They became leaders and achieved greatness back at home during peacetime.  In the 1960s of my childhood, we viewed ourselves as a country on a giant uptick, the defender of liberty, the right side of the cold war, a legacy of the Greatest Generation, of Ike and Kennedy and champions of world-wide liberty.  The War Bike stood for all of that, in some weird, inchoate way. 

 
In the waning years of the War Bike’s utility and our childhood fixation with it, another war was rearing its head; and older brothers were sent from our neighborhood to Vietnam when their draft numbers came up. That war came into our living rooms on TV and in “Life” magazine images; the weary GIs in bandages, naked children running from the burning village.  It was a very different conflict than the sweeping global wars that had preceded it and citizens protested, loudly questioning its purpose.  That criticism began to rip at the seams of America. 

 
When the young men and women came back from Vietnam, our nation marginalized their service.  We muted their experience.  It had been a divisive war, with no clear sense of victory. It simply wound down, with a heart-breaking black and white death toll.  

 
With Vietnam, there had been no national pulling together, no Victory Gardens or gas rationing, no Pearl Harbor attack to rally around.  And in its wake, we somehow skipped the welcome home.  Serving your country, enlisting in the military, had gone out out of vogue.  Veterans learned to pack their uniforms away, avert their eyes and shush up if questions arose.  You talked about it only in the right company, or not at all. We let down a generation of young people who returned.  We let down their families, their wives and mothers, their siblings and children, all of whom got a front row seat to bear witness to the ugliness of untreated internal wounds.  The psychological damage.  We didn’t know how to fix what we couldn’t see.  It was more comfortable for our nation to ignore their damage, their scars and their service.


Photo by SrA Christina Brownlow.
I don’t recall what finally happened to the War Bike.  It was eclipsed one birthday by a bright orange ten-speed with ram’s horn handlebars.  After that my mother’s bike was forgotten; an unfitting, embarrassing relic for a pre-teen girl. 

 
But dredging up those memories of my old self on the War Bike leads me to wonder how my own children view the concept of war.  What is their perception of serving their country?  How will they judge the present day conflicts with the benefit of hindsight and history?  And how, in the long run, will they treat those who have come home requiring a lifetime of assistance?  

 
With an all-volunteer military today, our children don’t have to ask themselves if they are willing to lay down their lives on foreign soil in service to their country.  And when I personally ponder the question, I must admit it is a sobering sacrifice.  As a mother, I’d have to think long and hard about that.


This Memorial Day, as we honor those who have given their lives, their limbs and their mental health and well-being when their nation asked them to go, let’s all take a moment to reflect on the real meaning of this holiday.   Regardless of your politics, our veterans and their families deserve our nation’s respect and gratitude.  We owe them the best chance to re-take the stage of their lives when they return home from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.  Take a moment of silence on Monday to remember them, and to remind your children and neighbors just what that means.  And then do something.  Take action.  It’s the best part of what it means to be an American.  Give time, give dollars, learn more, discover what families have served in your town, investigate what organizations are helping vets at the grassroots level. Volunteer.  Give back.  It doesn’t take a huge investment to show a veteran that their sacrifices count.


Photo taken by Stefan Radtke at Stand Up For Heroes, 2012, Remind.org. 



One place to start is www.bobwoodrufffoundation.org.

 
                                                
  
Friday
Jul012011

RED, WHITE AND BLUE  

“Mrs. Woodruff, what girl is ever going to go home with me from a bar?”  He looked up at me with a lopsided grin that said he was partially joking but also dead serious.  His voice was devoid of self pity.  

I glanced at his thick reddish blonde hair, wide smile, his incredibly muscled shoulders and then my eyes strayed to his legs, or where his legs should have been.  Darren was a private in the US Army, who’d been hit by a car bomb in Fallujah. He is a 24 year-old double amputee.

In these wild oats years, when he should have been kicking up his heels in every honky tonk bar in his native Tennessee, Darren had spent more than a year in a VA Hospital recovering from the physical and emotional injuries of war.  Like so many veterans, real recovery is an ongoing journey.  This is what life looks like, interrupted, but undeterred. 

He’d been in middle school when Bin Laden and his band of terrorists slammed into the World Trade Centers and the Pentagon. It had made an impression as a boy.  And when he was old enough, he told me, he’d signed up because he was an American and it was the right thing to do.  Darren wanted some action.  He wanted to defend his country from terrorists.  He had assessed the danger, but the bad thing always happens to someone else.

There is never any “why me” from guys like Darren, no palpable self-pity.  “This isn’t a disability,” one marine I met said to me, dancing in his wheel chair and popping a wheelie – “this is just a different way to get around.” 
 
It’s entirely possible that you’ve never run across a guy like Darren. Many of our service members live in and return to small towns and rural areas.  They hail from the Midwest and points south, from Texas and New England.  For those of us who make our livings in cities, it might not immediately occur to us that the man with the service dog on the sidewalk is an Iraq war vet or the mother with the prosthetic arm in Wal-Mart served two tours.  These are proud and humble people, mostly self-deprecating in that envious way that makes you wish you had a little more of that.  
 

The people I’ve met don’t see themselves as heroes.  They were just doing their job, they’ll tell you. And their job was protecting us.  Just ask the Navy Seals who took out Bin Laden or the medic who was able to put two tourniquets on his guys before he attended to his own blown off leg. This job is not for the faint of heart.  And that job benefits you whether you feel it or not.  Someone has to protect the castle. Someone has to pull the night watchman’s shift.

This Fourth of July, I hope you have a chance to gather with family and friends.  And as you celebrate by a lake or an ocean, overlook the purple mountain’s majesty or the rolling plains, someone like Darren, someone young and proud and very brave, is on a foreign base or in a military vehicle in the desert, wearing far too much gear for a place so hot. They are there because their country asked them to go and they stood up and raised their hands.
 

There are no politics here, no labels.  This isn’t about being for or against these wars.  And it’s not about being pro-military, hawk or dove, donkey or elephant.

This is about the fact that no matter what complaints we have about our country, no matter what we’d like to change or improve, every single one of us should take pride in being American.   The same kind of resonant pride that bloomed after September 11th.  Sure, there is corruption and abuse of power; there are pork barrel politics, racism and extremism.  But we are a complex nation.  We fought for the right to be independent, and we founded a nation on the principal that all were welcome, free from persecution and tyranny and we’ve done the best we could with the times we had.  As a country we are continually a work in progress.  We are a perfectly imperfect vast land of disparate, differing folks braided together. We are fallible, but ever hopeful, ever striving.
 
This July 4th, take a moment in between the BBQ or the fireworks to think about what it means to be personally free, and how that freedom has a cost.  More than 360,000 of our veterans have returned home from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan with some kind of a brain injury alone.  That doesn’t count the amputees or the fallen.  Behind each one of these statistics are individuals and families whose lives are forever changed, irretrievably different because of their service.
 


And when our countrymen come home wounded, different or broken—it’s up to the rest of us, the people like you and me who didn’t make a sacrifice, to take care of them.
That’s just simply what people of a great nation do.
I hope this video inspires you this July 4th.